INVESTING IS HARD.
BEING BAD AT IT IS OPTIONAL
Practical investing advice for normal people. snark included. Profits preferred.
The 3 Articles Every Investor Should Read First
If you’re new here, start with these.
These guides cover the fundamentals of smarter investing without the Wall Street nonsense.
The Budget Bunker: How to Save Like a Prepper Without Feeling Broke
(A Witty Investor Survival Guide to Not Going Financially Extinct) Most people treat saving money like dieting: a great idea… tomorrow. Meanwhile, their bank accounts…
The 5-Minute Investor: How Doing Less Can Make You Richer
The Busy Investor’s Lie If you’ve ever stared at your brokerage app like it’s Tinder — swiping, second-guessing, and checking “just one more stock” —…
AI Stock Frenzy: The New Crypto Bros — Don’t Be Their Exit Liquidity
In 2025, AI stocks have taken center stage much like cryptocurrency did a few years ago. The same group of investors who once shouted “Bitcoin…
Financial Wisdom (With a Side of Sarcasm)
Articles to help you invest smarter and panic less.
8 Best Dividend Stocks for March 2026: Expert Picks
Dividend stocks have always been the steady workhorses of income investing, and March 2026 is shaping up to be an interesting time for income seekers….
Timber Stocks: The “Boring” Investment That Might Just Save Your Portfolio From Ruin
Let’s be honest. If you’re at a cocktail party and you tell someone you invest in timber stocks, their eyes will glaze over faster than…
Raw Land Due Diligence: 7 Non-Negotiable Checks Before You Sign the Deed
Raw Land Due Diligence: 7 Non-Negotiable Checks Before You Sign the Deed (The Reality Check Edition) Imagine standing on a pristine plot of 40 acres,…
The Witty Investor’s 5 Rules for Avoiding Stupidity (Charlie Munger Style)
The Cult of Avoiding Stupidity If you pay attention to financial media, you’d be forgiven for believing that investing success requires precognition, complex algorithms, or…
Turkey-Brained Money Moves: The 7 Financial Mistakes Everyone Makes During the Holidays
(A brutally honest guide for anyone who thinks “But it was 40% off!” counts as financial literacy.) Every year, millions of people sit down for…
The Investor Who Bought the Top (And Why You Will Too)
Let’s talk about the rare, mystical, highly-endangered creature known as the investor who bought the top. Yes, the same guy who swore he’d “wait for…
Why Most People Suck at Money: The 7 Psychological Sins of Investing
(A brutally honest guide for anyone who’s ever panic-sold, FOMO-bought, or checked their portfolio 17 times during lunch.) Your brain is an incredible piece of…
The Bunker Portfolio: How to Invest When the World Feels Fragile
A tactical, sarcastic guide for people who want their money to survive longer than the power grid. When the world feels like a Jenga tower…
Dividend Defense: Stocks That Survive Market Chaos
When the Market Panics, Dividend Defense Investors Brew Coffee When markets nosedive, the average investor reacts like a caffeinated squirrel on I-40 — darting between…
